We were born naive and we are taught by our society. I was playful child but I knew I should not sin so I deprived myself from things and that somehow impacted my happiness because there were rules for me by myself and the gods.I would always do prayer in the morning before I ate and if somehow I couldn’t perfrom prayer I would just starve myself.People around me were strong beliver of the gods, which eventually led me to be the another one. I was profoundly onto it and punished myself when I did awry.I would punish by overthinking just because what belivers called sin and I should say I did nothing wrong but I was just taught wrong and I was deeply onto it. Furthermore, with unreliable learning from being theist , it has slightly taught me about discipline and so I would say it did some good to me. However, I do not rue what I believed in and what I did, rather I just learnt from it and found whole new perspective towards the world and the scientists.
Well to talk about when I was still a believer, I had only perspective and that was the prejudiced perspective. But gradually, I was learning different things as I got internet connection.I still remember the day when my father told me that we would be getting internet and I still cherish that moment. Well, not only the internet changed the things but I had couple of cousins I would hangout with back in the days and they were older than me and both of my cousins were atheist which I didn’t know what that mean becuase I thought everyone in the world followed the gods and I could have searched in the internet what the word ” atheist” mean but they didn’t tell me actual word rather they would say,”how can you be a believer of something which you have never seen”. I would get home after hanging out with them and I would think for while but not to the crust and I would ask my mom but she would always say,oh,there is god and I believed in her and the things from my cousins really didn’t bother me and time was gradually going on and I was growing . One day, three of us were hanging out and suddenly there sparked a debate between three of us and I was debating with them, me on one side and two of them on other side.And that debate changed me because I couldn’t defend their logical points and as soon as I got home I started to search for things and I found that the creator is not the god but it is the earth itself. And from the very next day, I started asking questions to my tutors , friends and of course my mom becausee she was such a believer and she told me,”we have not seen, but it is meant to be felt,” and that completely left me miserable for while because I thought there was someone who would always be there no matter what. And from that day , I started to learn more and more and found out evolution is everything.
Albeit, I am non believer now but I am not against the gods. I respect the people who believe in gods and who do not so basically I respect every indivdual. I have seen people who knows there exist no god but still tend to believe because they want to have hope within. However, it is all good because we all are just trying to live in peaceful life and it does not matter whether you want to have hope from super natrural power or natural power. As aforementioned, I have learnt things from being theist and I do not rue whatsoever.